blah blah blah

I have been doing major sewing and deep reflection. I realize the absolute love I have for a needle and thread. I can shit poetry all day but it doesn't calm my soul like sitting at a sewing machine for hours, meticulously stitching a 1950s chiffon day dress back to it's original state (maybe a little smaller, to fit me, and since most of the seams had already frayed away).
I love poetry, it can be like nourishment, but I can't wear a poem around to show it off, hell, it's hard enough to speak a poem aloud and get a honest response when so many people would rather placate each other.(I think that is why I have such a love hate relationship with poetry, or maybe just poets.) With a piece of garment I've mended, or sewed entirely, it doesn't hurt my ego when someone hates it, where I can't say that for sure about my poetry.
I've always had confidence when it came to my apparel. It could be because my mom gave me free range over what I wore, and despite my oldest sister's objections and jokes, I continued to rock those outfits (I also have to remind, Bridgett helped me buy my first real vintage dress at age 11, a 1960s navy and ivory linen shift type dress). When I do feel self-conscious in my clothes (and I have before), it's always for the right reasons; fabric, shape, and size, it's never because it's not the 'in' thing. However, that doesn't mean I don't sport the 'in' thing or hate it, cause I love it! but in my way, mixed with my fashion.
My point is, I love clothes. I think that was apparent by the time I was 7. There maybe times I wish I were more creative with my garments, but there is never a time I doubt my love for designing, sewing, and wearing clothes! However, I cannot always say that for poetry, I feel there is more growth to be had. So, here it is... I want to pursue a career in one of the following fields; costuming for live theatre, fashion history or design/alterations. Now that the reflection is ending, I have to figure out how to do this...