first time

The first time is always the best? Or the worst? Or maybe, more correctly, not as memorable as you'd of liked.
I have never had a blog. Perhaps it is because I fear it will be self indulgent... but what isn't? After a slow persuasion of myself and a friend advising it might be a good idea, I have become a blogger. (Now if I ever reproduce I can tell those off springs of mine "Well, yes, in the early 21st century when computers were still a science I joined the blog sphere, an up and coming world in those times..." Nope, nevermind, I probably wont ever mention it.)
I believe in this time of my life I need an outlet that contains writing. Being an aspiring poet that hasn't wrote a poem in months and before that maybe a year (sad eh?), this is a last desperate attempt to get my brain working. I am more depressed than ever about most of my life situations and in the past when things got weird and off balance I wrote. I drank coffee, smoked cigarettes and wrote. Paranoia is the last thing I want or need but if I don't start purging the things in my head I will end up in a cave somewhere "knowing" that world has it in for me.
So here it goes! I will write for cyberspace like I use to write for paper, for no one and nothing else. And, in this process I will most likely divulge way to much about my life, my thoughts, my relationships and my cats. But, that is what I know, and one should write only about what one knows?